Dating after divorce for a christian
After all I am over half a century old with an adult son and a daughter in High School. Some advisers tell me that I need to wait until I am dead, well almost dead to start dating again.
It’s a theological tangle I’m not qualified to unpick – we each have to exercise our own judgement.Study them and memorize ones you can bring to mind in the moment. For instance, we’re often given this passage as a scripture about marriage: But tell me, guys, how can you present your someday wife as “holy and blameless” if you disregarded her sexual purity before you put the ring on her finger? Firefighters suggest you know and practice your escape route, just in case your house or building catches fire. Take the long view here, knowing that whomever you marry should enter the marriage feeling respected, protected, and loved — as demonstrated by Christ. So you get to that moment where your God-created, sexually charged body is going nuclear with desire, and you’re somehow supposed to shut that off like a flip-switch. You need strategies (or tactics — I get those two confused) to keep from getting into that my-brain-is-mush moment. Unfortunately, it’s often the wrong question, because what you’re really asking is how close to the land mines can you get without being in danger. Rather, ask what level of affection is honoring to God and respectful of your date. But if you’re sitting across from someone at a dinner table or walking hand-in-hand through a museum, it’s not likely you’re going to get busy there. Things like “If I start feeling extremely turned on, I need a break. Does that mean you already crossed the line and should just give up and go for it? Can we promise to signal each other if we’re feeling tempted, and we’ll immediately leave and take a walk?